It's okay to have other people. You know that, right? I want to be there for you, but you're allowed to let yourself have friends. God knows being with me and the apocalypse hasn't exactly given you the chance. Take advantage of the change while you can.
Considering you've been an amazing friend to me? That seems difficult to believe. You take care of people, Martin. You're thoughtful and generous. You try to do the right thing, even when it's difficult. That seems good enough as a starting point.
You had baggage weighing you down at home, commitments you couldn't get out of. It's not the same here. You're not bound to the Institute. The world isn't imminently doomed or already ended. I have enough money to pay for the basics. I know you're still a Sub and this place is awful, but we can change our contract however you'd like to try to make things better and easier for you.
[This isn't a conversation he should be having when so severely sleep-deprived. But it would seem they're going to have it.]
I should have told you I appreciated your tea more, you know? The extra work you put in. I did, but I hardly ever said it. What you do might not be saving worlds, but you've made me happy. You've made my life easier, and something I want to keep living. I think you could do that for other people. That would be enough, right?
[It hurts to hear it, although not necessarily in a bad way. It hurts like lancing a wound, but also like a bone deep ache because Jon deserved better. He'd always deserved to have things that made him happy. Just being made tea shouldn't be a big deal.]
It sounds nice Jon but- I don't even know where to start. This is the most people I've interacted with in years honestly.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 11:27 pm (UTC)Are they... normal spiders?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 11:38 pm (UTC)Maybe.
I don't know.
I can feel them watching me.
[He is severely sleep-deprived and may be hallucinating just a bit, as well.]
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 11:40 pm (UTC)Can you just stare back at them? Pretty sure your stare is more powerful than theirs Mr Avatar of Ceaseless Watching.
cw: arachnophobia, body horror
Date: 2021-05-06 11:53 pm (UTC)Doesn't exactly help with sleeping, does it?
I used to have nightmares about them when I was a kid.
Crawling into my eyes while I was asleep.
Re: cw: arachnophobia, body horror
Date: 2021-05-06 11:56 pm (UTC)I'm sorry you had nightmares like that.
Is there anything I can do to help?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-06 11:58 pm (UTC)[It's not helpful.]
I don't know.
See if we have any Statements about prison spiders that have come in tomorrow?
In the morning.
The proper morning.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-07 11:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-05-07 11:41 pm (UTC)You shouldn't pick up my bad habits.
Why are you even awake?
I woke you up.
I'm sorry.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-07 11:52 pm (UTC)I don't really sleep that well a lot of the time anyway. And it's harder when I'm on my own.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-07 11:58 pm (UTC)Could you sleep with someone else?
Tim or Sasha, maybe?
Morrigan's nice, as well.
I'm sure he'd say yes.
Have you made many friends here, yet?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 02:04 pm (UTC)I'm not calling your boyfriend at 3am just because I'm not sleeping well.
It's fine. I'm fine.
And I- I don't need anyone else, okay?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 02:10 pm (UTC)It's okay to have other people.
You know that, right?
I want to be there for you, but you're allowed to let yourself have friends.
God knows being with me and the apocalypse hasn't exactly given you the chance.
Take advantage of the change while you can.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 02:15 pm (UTC)You're not the problem Jon.
I'm just not- not good friend material, okay? It doesn't work.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 02:23 pm (UTC)That seems difficult to believe.
You take care of people, Martin.
You're thoughtful and generous.
You try to do the right thing, even when it's difficult.
That seems good enough as a starting point.
You had baggage weighing you down at home, commitments you couldn't get out of.
It's not the same here.
You're not bound to the Institute.
The world isn't imminently doomed or already ended.
I have enough money to pay for the basics.
I know you're still a Sub and this place is awful, but we can change our contract however you'd like to try to make things better and easier for you.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 05:40 pm (UTC)There's nothing wrong with the contract Jon. Really. It's me.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 06:24 pm (UTC)I should have told you I appreciated your tea more, you know?
The extra work you put in.
I did, but I hardly ever said it.
What you do might not be saving worlds, but you've made me happy.
You've made my life easier, and something I want to keep living.
I think you could do that for other people.
That would be enough, right?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 08:36 pm (UTC)It sounds nice Jon but- I don't even know where to start. This is the most people I've interacted with in years honestly.
The Institute really did a number on us all.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 11:12 pm (UTC)I'm sorry, Martin.
What can I do to help?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 11:34 pm (UTC)And besides, you're kind of stuck in a prison cell. Shouldn't I be the one trying to help you?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-08 11:38 pm (UTC)I'm just stuck in jail.
Do you need me to introduce you to people?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-09 12:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-05-09 01:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-05-09 11:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2021-05-10 12:52 am (UTC)You do have to make quota, and I know I'm not much use for it.
Sorry.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-11 10:14 pm (UTC)You know it's not- I love you. And not being into sex doesn't change that. You know that, right?
(no subject)
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